Dear mummy, at nearly 3 years old I’m starting to understand Christmas.
First comes the Advent Calendar. What are these magical doors of joy? Everyday I unearth another numbered door which opens up to show a pretty picture and foil. I use my little fingers to pry it open and eat this wonderful thing called chocolate! Why does it taste so good and why can I only have one at a time?!
Then the Christmas Tree. Why would you have tree INSIDE the house. And you tell me off for opening up my umbrella indoors. Strange folks. What I find even more peculiar is that you then proceed to hang glass ornaments on it?!? Are you mad! Why is it lit? Is it safe? These are some of the questions I ask my folks.
I must admit it does look rather pretty and mesmerizing. Why make it look so tempting to a toddler when I’m not allowed to touch it?!? Go figure…
I like the Star at the top of the tree and over the next couple of days I will hatch a plan to obtain it! I’ve already tried to stand on my stool, plastic chair and daddy’s back to reach it! Someone at nursery told me that if I’m a good girl Father Christmas will bring me a present and put it under our Christmas Tree.
Santa Baby. I’ve heard you mention this bloke in a red suit a couple of times. They’ve even started to refer to him on CBEEBIES…who is this Father Christmas and Santa? Are they the same person? How come he’s all over the place? Like, I saw him in Morrisons at the weekend and then on the same day he was in the garden centre! How can he be in two places at the same time?!? This perplexes me.
Oh, and for the record have you seen how small our chimney is? There isn’t a hope in hell he’s getting down that!
I watched you intently over the weekend hang large smelly socks on the fireplace…they can’t be ours and must belong to a giant! I hope he doesn’t come to visit…I’m scared of giants.
I’ve never seen a reindeer fly! Why can Reindeer fly? See all the farms you’ve taken me to they don’t have wings? Do they only fly at Christmas time? They must be like celebrities as you know them all by name and sing about them. Next time I visit a farm I’m going to look for their wings. It must be true as you read it from a book.
Those damn Jingle Bells. Everywhere I hear strange jingling music, on the radio festive cheer is played, in the shops the same music is blurted out and even at nursery…I can’t escape it!
The hiding places. Why all of a sudden has wrapped presents magically appeared and more over why are they stored in the airing cupboard, under the stairs and at the back of your wardrobe? I’ve already seen them so please stop hiding them from me!
Our house now resembles the homewear department at the House of Fraser with its scatter pillows and scented candles and soft lighting. This Christmas lark hasn’t just affect your brain but the place I live in.
My storybook collection has gone from spooky books and autumn leaves to winters scenes….I sometimes feel you are trying to brainwash me with this thing called ‘Christmas’.
Lighting food? Why light a Christmas pudding…don’t you know it will burn? Haven’t you seen the Sainsbury’s advert! I don’t really fancy calling out the fire brigade. Also what are these green things on my plate? Green balls of leaves…are you trying to poison me!!
But it’s not just all about the visible aspects of Christmas… It’s what goes on behind the scenes…..
Christmas through the eyes of my parents.
Planning, or the lack of it. Christmas has creeped up on my folks. It was like the whole of November and beginning of December just vanished.
Buying, or panic buying as my folks like to call it. Amazon has been their best friend, however they’ve ordered everything online with Christmas delivery dates for this week. They’ve started to stalk the postie. Watching his every move, and following the courier companies incase they head to our road… And we’re not in. The only card my folks don’t want to see this year is the one from the Royal Mail about a missed delivery.
Cooking, or binge eating.
My parents like to eat…a lot. Gone are the stored mince pies, tin of Roses and gold coins for the stockings…and this was on the first day of Christmas!
Pressure and expectation. Everyone wants that ‘perfect’ Christmas Day, my folks need to stop looking at Instagram and Pinterest! Don’t they know that it’s not real?! It’s meticulously made under controlled conditions (without a toddler), with perfect lighting and after 100 unwanted shots. You only have one shot at Christmas and it’s better being real than fake. No, I don’t need that filter on my Brussels sprout…it will still look green and taste horrible.
Life isn’t picture perfect and it’s about the moments that can’t be captured and that go in a blink of an eye!
So a word to the wise…(manly to my folks) This Christmas immerse yourself in the present and being there. Enjoy spending time with the family and don’t worry about the outside world for one day. Some moments are better remembered in your head as opposed to on a phone and shared with your thousands of followers. Plus…you’re starting to run out of iPhone memory….must be all those damn Christmas songs!!
To all my followers and loved ones this Christmas I wish you all the best for the holiday season. We’ll be signing off now for a week (blogging break) to enjoy some family time. See you in the New Year for more adventures!!
Love Bella… Oh and her folks Dawn and Alex xx